Part Fifty Four: Southern Patagonia

Just south of the tiny hamlet of Bajo Caracoles in central Patagonia there is a 50km stretch of road, that, for want of a better name, we will here call, ‘That-stinking-bastard-piece-of-frickin-crap’ road. It’s paved and runs straight as the proverbial arrow and flat as the equally proverbial pancake in a west-sou-westerly direction.

If you should find yourself on a bicycle and on this road (and not the lovely curly one opposite), on an afternoon when the prevailing wind is doing its thing and raging away from the West, then please ensure that you have come equipped. That means 1 x core made from Diamond and Kryptonite infused Einsteinium, Nobelium and Buffaldium. If not, you are far better off just sitting at home, having a scone with marmalade, some tea and a nice lie down.

Your long suffering (and ever-humble) correspondent spent six hours chugging away into this bastard wind and I am not ashamed to admit that on more than a few occasions I felt the above-constituted core softening a tad.

More Lakes and mountains just off Austral Highway

Late in the afternoon I made the blissful turn sweeping gloriously away to the southeast and could then blast over the next 60km in less than two hours chasing down the startled road-runners until, squawking out a defeated ‘beep-beep’ they opt for jamming their crest-fallen selves through a fence to escape rather than get rounded up by an elated bicyclist.

Road From Hell

Such is an average day riding Patagonia. Distances start to diminish in importance where 1km can take anything between two or 10 minutes depending on the wind.

Me and a guy who seemed willing to listen to drunken Spanglish in Bajo Caracoles, “miles from nowhere”.

Bajo Caracoles had been the venue for the consumption of much cheap red wine just two nights before. My Spanglish becoming oddly fluent as the night progressed.

I now find myself being blown across to the Atlantic coast where I give another prayer to Stribog then turn south for the last couple of day’s ride to Tierra Del Fuego.


  1. rob fletcher says:

    i’d take your time if i were you the weather back in the UK is awful !!its been raining for weeks…

  2. Very glad to hear that the core remained intact despite Stribog’s wrath. A few IPA’s in The Dubliner in just a few days will surely top it up! Well done Buff3er – I bet you can almost feel the end!

  3. hey Buff3y, remember the (old) Swiss couple on the ruta de las lagunas? I just realized that we were in fact the hardest core cyclists – now slowly melting down in cosy Switzerland… We send You the best wishes from Switzerland and a photo in a separate mail. Love Your ingenious blog!

    • Hey Hans. Sure I remember meeting you guys. Hope you enjoyed that Bolivian track. It was a highlight for me. Am crossing to Tierra Del Fuego tomorrow so I will hopefully be finished and home very soon.

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